Descriptive Commenting Cheat Sheet (Free Download)

A quick, practical guide to help you talk to your child in a way that builds cooperation, confidence, and connection — without nagging, correcting, or turning everything into questions.

Descriptive commenting is simply saying what you see (and what they’re doing well). It’s one of the fastest ways to reduce power struggles because it gives attention to the behaviour you want to see more of.

Inside this cheat sheet you’ll get:

• simple “say this instead of that” swaps
• real examples for everyday moments (play, chores, routines, schoolwork)
• what to avoid when you’re trying to guide behaviour
• easy prompts you can use when your brain goes blank

Print it, screenshot it, or keep it open on your phone — and use it daily for calmer communication at home.

Disclaimer:

Created from my learnings in The Incredible Years® Parenting Program. This resource is for general education only and is not a substitute for professional advice or therapy. Use what fits your family and seek extra support if needed.